Daily Retard Exclusive
Attendances Drop!

Well golly gosh and slap my thighs, you don't say? And here's me thinking everything was going great guns as well! Talk about stating the obvious...the article in the Retard must surely take the biscuit with their 'Special Report' today on falling attendances in the SPL. How they get away with taking old news and regurgitating it as an 'exclusive' I'll never know...on second thoughts I do know, they'd print anything rather than good news.

I suppose I should be thankful in that they had one of their number crunchers dig out a whack of statistics, that should save me some leg work when it comes to publicising the two for one offer, but then again, with their 'record' can these figures be construed as accurate? Your guess is as good as mine.

No matter how they have doctored the figures (and as much as they can slant things they probably have to draw the line at telling complete lies due to legalities) they don't make good reading. But did we really need three pages in the 'sports' section today to tell us something we already know? I apologise for labouring the point here but as you can probably tell, when my work mate showed me article this morning (you don't think I actually bought it do you!) my blood was boiling.

Big launch or no big launch, the press corps are well aware of Killie's two for one offer on season tickets, and yet they choose to ignore it. They highlight the falling attendances but refuse to mention the fact that we are the only club in the country who are making real attempts to reverse the trend. They include a one line quote from David Heath and bury it where no one will see it, when what they should be doing is making it back page headlines.

Make no mistake, the venture the club is about to embark upon is unprecedented in the football world, and the first genuine attempt to get fans back supporting our national sport. Apparently it's still not as significant as Llama Lorenzo and his Scummerset shenanigans though which was given a thousand times more column inches in the popular (sic) press.

For the benefit of the hacks who trawl the independent football sites looking to pick up stories (and we know you're out there) here are a few thoughts to ponder. Half price season tickets! SPL football cheaper than SFL football! Every match for under 8 quid! If you fail to see potential headlines there then things really are as bad as we suspect. As much as we appreciated the SCARF campaign that was introduced when you feared that the old firm were leaving the country (aye right) we'd appreciate more if you'd give our season ticket initiative more coverage and let the people of Scotland know that things can be done to improve the current plight.

The boards of the other clubs should not be exempt from criticism either. They seem quite happy to complain about the rescheduling of games and the demise of crowds on one hand while still accepting brown envelopes with the TV revenue in the other. That my good friends is hypocrisy of the highest order. They seem quite content to sit back and watch if our club's gamble pays off, without actually trying anything of any significance themselves. What's to stop them from doing a two for one deal with their fans next season? Nothing, apart from a severe lack of balls and an innate sense of self preservation.